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More Than Enough: A Love Letter to Women of Color Struggling with Perfectionism

Writer's picture: Nina RodgersNina Rodgers

If I had to trace back the exact time period that my perfectionism kicked in, I would say it was likely somewhere around elementary school; a time where social hierarchies were more obvious, getting A's was celebrated, you got stickers for "being good," and being in programs like gifted and talented were a surefire way to gain validation from teachers and parents.



Fast forward to my adult life, and the urge to be exceptional no matter what grew even stronger as I entered the corporate world. And this time, the stakes were higher. Not being exceptional or performing at a high level created the fear of being let go from a job, or being passed over for opportunities entirely.


But perfectionism is a trap, and a dangerous one at that.


For women of color who have historically been told that we were three-fifths of a human being, that our brown skin and features are not as beautiful as our white counterparts, or that we’re somehow undeserving of the roles we rightfully earn, it’s no wonder that so many of us struggle with perfectionism. White Supremacy Culture would have us believe that there is something inherently wrong with us, and that we have to work as hard as possible to make up for that ‘wrongness.’



For women of color, surrendering the belief that we are inferior and must, in the words of Poppa Pope, be twice as good to get half as much, can help us to show up more authentically at work, and feel more empowered in the process. Perfectionism, just like objectivity and neutrality, is a myth. To be human is to make errors–and that’s not a sign of our flaws, it’s a sign of our humanity and livelihood.


Breaking free from perfectionism means accepting that we will make mistakes, and those mistakes do not define our worth, value, competence, or ability to get the job done. While White folks are given the grace to fail forward, judgments are quickly made against women of color for the slightest of errors.


The expectations placed on us—often unspoken but deeply felt—are heavy. We must not only excel but also navigate biases that question our competence before we’ve even had the chance to prove ourselves. This leads to the exhausting practice of over-preparing, overthinking, and overworking in an attempt to mitigate scrutiny. But perfectionism’s promise of safety and acceptance is false. The reality is that no matter how “perfect” we try to be, we are still subjected to systemic inequities and implicit biases.


Any space that would want to demote you, put you on a performance improvement plan (PIP), or micromanage you after minor errors is not a sign of your failure–it’s a sign of how that space is upholding tenets of White Supremacy Culture. If you’re taking accountability for your actions, being transparent with leadership about what went wrong, and identifying what you could do differently, you’ve done enough. You deserve to be in spaces where your humanity is recognized and respected.



The journey to unlearning perfectionism starts with self-compassion. It’s about understanding that you are already enough, simply by existing. It’s about extending the same grace to yourself that you so freely give to others. For women of color, it’s a radical act to claim our humanity in systems that seek to deny it. Self-compassion allows us to see mistakes as opportunities to learn, rather than as evidence of our unworthiness.


Building a support system is also crucial. Surround yourself with people who affirm your value beyond your productivity or achievements. Seek out mentors, peers, and allies who understand the unique challenges you face and who can offer guidance and encouragement. It’s also important to celebrate your wins—big and small—because they are a testament to your resilience and brilliance.


On an organizational level, employers must actively dismantle the structures and practices that perpetuate perfectionism and bias. This includes providing psychological safety, fostering a culture where mistakes are seen as part of growth, and ensuring equitable opportunities for advancement. Employers should also invest in DEI initiatives that prioritize the well-being and development of women of color, rather than treating them as an afterthought.


Resist the urge to prove your worth during the times you may get it wrong at work. If you need support in unraveling how White Supremacy Culture has impacted your view of yourself at work, or if your organization wants to commit to being a safe space for women of color to grow, schedule a consultation with ShiftED today.


To all the women of color reading this: You are more than enough. You are worthy of joy, rest, and fulfillment—not because of what you achieve, but simply because of who you are. Let go of the heavy burden of perfectionism and step into the freedom of knowing that you are already complete.






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